The cold water caressed my skin. Eyes closed, I let it wash me blue, like a long slow song. I opened my eyes and saw her- a wallflower among the pretty roses.
She was not particularly beautiful, 'passable' was almost a kind adjective for her. And no, she didn't have any peculiar charm. She was just another girl. I could see even from a distance she was a little headstrong compared to the other pretty, cute women. A headstrong wallflower- she was an oxymoron. A little like me. For some reason, I liked her.
I had met her only a few days ago, in an artists' convention. She talked with conviction, pride shivering in her voice. She didn't seem to care that nobody else cared as much about what she said. About new techniques for using new tools. About meaning in art. I confess I wasn't listening too well either. Her voice was sweeping me in an ocean of colors- hazel, peach, calm sky blue.
There definitely was something about her!
I went back to my spot on the shore and picked my paintbrush. I was going to compose a melody in color. A slow song, filled with love, calling out to that lady. The first few notes close to each other, just the same notes playing with each other. Then slowly rising, slowly with the chords still on the lower scales. And then the violinists taking over- higher, higher. And finally, back to the melody. The painting was of the sky and the waves, with just a hint of a woman in the distance..
I wanted so badly to run to her and tell her that she had changed my life. She had made the invisible thrushes sing and the spring flowers bloom in winter. Well, for all the poetic dreaming I could go on with- I was scared.She was too smart for me. Too bold. She would definitely slap me. Or say, "I am disappointed with you!". So, I stopped myself and focused on the colors with the song in my head.
Maybe all that love was meant to be converted into musical paintings... And besides, ......
I moved the umbrella to my side because I hate the sun shining in my eyes. The sea was beautiful. Vast. Silent. I love silence. Which is the only reason I come to the beach. I don't have a beach body. I hate getting into the water and feeling inadequate in front of everyone. But just watching the plain sea and no people- bliss!
I was at the beach that day because of a guy. He was an artist too, like me. And he seemed to understand what I was saying- at least some times! He wasn't great looking, though he looked good enough to me. But was he witty! Just thinking of him made me smile- me, who had forgotten to smile in years of struggle with my condition. My mind kept jumping to all the funny things he said, as if it was a separate entity out of my control. Well, well. I guess I am an idiot too- like everyone else.
Maybe I should go talk to him. He cannot possibly be rude to a woman. But then again, nobody likes women who pursue too much. Maybe I should let him be. I know too well no one likes women who argue, think, rebel and generally behave like men do. And he was just a normal guy.
He walked out of the water and took his easel. I could see the colors clearly- he wasn't too far. As he painted, I could hear a song in my head. It was a romantic song, but sort of a symphony too. Somewhere it seemed to be calling out to a woman. Oh, well. He was probably calling out to one of those pretty blondes hanging there. One of them always hangs out with him. Maybe his girlfriend. Or maybe he just secretly likes her.
No, I wasn't jealous. So what if she had the perfect tan and body like a sculpture? So what if her blue eyes were the dream of every man around? To hell with men, anyway. I went back to listening to the song (in my head, of course. He wasn't singing- it was just the way his colors sounded in my mind!).
I guess I got enough of him from his art anyway. Besides....
He and She
Besides, which normal person would love ME after they knew I had synesthesia?
(Note: Synesthesia is a rare mental condition where different senses are sort of cross-wired in the brain. Synesthetics can hear colors, smell sounds etc. I am not sure if there is a color->sound synesthesia though there is definitely a sound-> color one. So, this story might not be strictly scientific. Artistic license I guess. Hope you liked it! :) )